estoy detrás!

sorry hasn't update in a while..gotten letters of complaint and hate mails already from people whom constantly visit this place....... all my energy was drained in my fight against the 3.5k essay i had to submit 2 days ago. Was doing some cultural thing on graffiti artwork...i thought i didn't like essay writing, but as soon as i got it going, the ride was quite enjoyable.

Painting on an array of connected surfaces (i.e. the corner of a room). Such technique exaggerates the viewing plane by distorting the artwork giving it a 3 dimensional form. and at certain viewpoints, it actually delete the corners of the room. IThe techinical term is known as ‘anamorphic projection’.
-chu

Hmm, done with sharing bits of my research work, now..now i don't know what i should write.....hmm......ok, lets try this one.......yesterday as usual i was playing soccer at amk with my soccer kakis, (don't worry, its not some narration of how i scored beautiful goals or bending the ball like beckham or dazzling the court with my magical skills...) one of team mate (who hasn't gotten my name right) asked for my name as sometimes he wants to make passes to me but i was looking at pretty girls passing by or giving autographs to my "fans"......

Back to reality....ok when he asked me, i had to think for awhile, and he was like puzzled.......i was wondering if i should tell him the hanyupinyin one or the dialect one. Frankly, the only people that call me by the name "genghao" are those from my pri school, my cousins, uncle and aunties. My parents have the priviledge of calling me in a more...erm i would say, warmth tone - "hao ah!"..A low "hao" and a hi "ah"......then i think when we reached some stage in primary school, my form teacher suddenly tell the class one day.."ok class, from today onwards you all have to write your names using the dialect forms"......for a moment i remembered clearly, i was feeling like my real identity is being taken away from me....i don't really feel comfortable with the new 'chong keng how'...It is from then on, we joked about our new dialect names and start identifying ourselves with that not seeing the potential negative effect it will have on us probably psychologically until when we are much older like now(at least for me to a cetain extent).... i was hesitating which one to tell him because i would prefer people to call me "genghao" at most times..genghao definately feels more comfortable and intimate.

this morning i was awaken by a strange dream, i was surprise it would be her in my dreams. it was a pretty saddening dream for it made me feel how some things you are only able to live it once and no more....that nostalgia feeling was strong again when i thought it was fading.....maybe one day it would be gone before we know it.....that is some misery maybe at some point we can't even be aware of........

Weds....in a few days time i would take on a journey whereby my usual self will not be able to handle, i will have to pick myself up from the dump and strive for the better......

time to wake up......sign or omen......

i jumped out of bed, took a superman shower, put on the my paint stained dockers and a checkered shirt, grab a bun and rushed to get a cab.....reason? i over-looked and did not notice i gotta go art studio today.

caught up in a jam.....and i thought its a usual morning jam. but i was wrong, an ambulance light was flickering up ahead and cars were busying filtering to the 2nd lane....i forgot what was on my mind at that instance....but when we come close to the scene, i saw a scrambler bike laying there, then i tried to keep a lookout for the injured. as my cab moves on a grishly image changed my mood for the fast-paced morning i had. the rider was already covered with a white sheet. Images start filling my sudden state of blankness. his friends informing his other friends that he's gone due to an accident...his parents grieving......etc.....what exactly happened i do not know, but a life has been lost......in a moist morning while we wake up and take our breakfast with our family, watched the latest mv on mtv channel, take your dog for a walk in the park, squeezing into the mrt with a crowd of people all heading for the city.......

"he" does not care what plans you have ahead for the day, "he" does not care where you would like to see yourself in 5 years time, "he" does not care that you are going to meet a interesting girl tomorrow, "he" does not care if you wanna be the most successful entrepreneur in future, "he" does not care if u have not spent much time with your family and finally regretted and want to do it the coming week when you are less busy.......once "he" appears in your life.....you will be gone like a speck of dust carrying with u all the memories and experiences u accumulated this lifetime of yours......leaving perhaps lots of people feeling very much upset over their lost, much more than you can ever imagine (ever again)........"somebody" out there, just want you to live life to the fullest while you still can....make it meaningful while you can.....enjoy it while you can.....make every minute counts.......

life is so fragile.
[sorry to write such a gloomy article, it's all part and parcel....we got to face it]

FIGHTO~

There are couple of nice people around you, help make their life merrier and more meaningful.

Wed afternoon, ready to start things afresh finally i hope....

listening to hanson mmmbop, these old tracks are so much better then current hits e.g pussycatdolls-don't cha, etc.....whats on their mind when they made the mv by the way...please enlighten me.


oh yah forget about the 2nd paragragh marked (xxXXXxx) on the previous post...i will write it here.

skipped (not skept which i used wrongly in my earlier post) school this morning again....i woke up punctually but felt tired. yes guilty again for missing school but would felt worse if i don't have sufficient sleep. i used to wake up every morning and look at the clock and quickly count the number of hours i have slept. if lesser than 8, i would try go back to sleep if i can...(for instance, this morning).....sleeping disorder is no joke, it complicates your health and that is one last thing you ever want happening to you. got the number to some specialist, drop me a note if you need some advices.

**Warning-do not read the following article.....it's existence is purely for page extension only*

earlier on, i drove to mount akina for a spin in my hummer h2......slow and steady up the slope. feeling the cool morning breeze on my cheeks and my cigar in my other hand. after having done some exercise and coming downhill....a evo9 delibrately stopped beside me and start revving his engine. then the bugger for some unknown reasons wind down his window and gave me a "thumbs down" hand sign before speeding off negotiating the first bend infront and disappearing into the mountains.....feeling pissed i rammed on my accelerator, breaking through the tranquility of the peaceful dawn and chase after the bugger. with my customised nitroX fittings, i caught up with him in no time(still feeling pissed as that boost cost me $50). i quickly overtook him using the "snakey" techinique and showed him a couple of high speed drifts on the coming bends as a warning to not mess with my hummer. 150km/h drifting round the bends send some rubber smell.......approaching the coming bend, i open my door and looked down my tired as i see them biting rough into the dirt road....even the smoke have made my chrome spinners less glamourous already. i stopped abruptly seeing the the bugger passed me. then i quickly unmount my friend's santa cruz bullit and bash through the woods cutting along the tracks. the adrenaline rush once again set me to paddling faster. the "travel " and the new bomber made me felt like flying through the woods. i finally reach the bottom of the hill in no time and as expected, the bugger was nowhere in sight. i went to the mac, ordered value combo 1 and feast on the junk food. finished my food, washed up the bike and took a short nap......finally the bugger emerged from the woods and looks at me in bewilderment......he couldn't accept his defeat to the bullit, exited his car and took a cab home.........[the above paragraph is based on a true story that might happen in the near future]

talking about the bullit, it belong to a friend of mine whom the rest and me got to know in BT(bukit timah). we were riding and bumped into him with a deflated tire. Being the ever nicest group of people alive in there, we supply him with extra tubes etc....we ended walking out togther eventually. thats how we know him and we continue to go on rides etc.......the menacing bike was repainted to white recently and it looked even cooler....hope the next time, it would be some girl with with a punctured tire.....haha

ok shall go do my report now........

lazy to think of a title at this hour.....

its the time of the night again where i contemplate whether to write or not to write....my heart really wants to but my mind tells me not to...wait a min..or is it the other way round. let you guys know tomorrow..... And ben/zy, if you are reading this.....hope you guys are doing well over there...i think i have a friend workng there as well, andrew seah.....if u see someone always "bioing" girls or flirting around with ang moh chicks...then he's the one....hahah...kidding la...he's a nice fellow la...just not as much as me...wahahaha.

(xxxXXXxXxxXXXXXXXXXXXXXxxxxxxxxxxxx
xXXxxxxxxxxXXXxxxxxxxxxxxXXXXXXXxxxxxxxxxxXXXXXXXXXX
xxxXXXXXXXXXXXXXXxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXxxxxxxxxxxxXx)

oh and todae i slept the first half of my class and i felt guilty about it.....better not screw up the "edutainment" presentation tomorrow....ok better pen off now before i regret it later...actually i am already is starting to....

(Xxxxx) - to be filled in tomorrow

lazy to update?

long week it has been, nothing much of the last of whole week to talk about, except some catching up, drinking sessions, and more drinking.

when this particular friend of mine suggest a dinner at his place, it has an underlying meaning of "lets have a drinking session and drink till drop!"..... not a fan of getting all drunk and feeling like a zombie the next day, but i always naively believe that it is a dinner and maybe just few glasses of drinks. that day we end up playing cards, drinking and having some boring forfeit..the same feeling i had from that december "reunion dinner"....playing some rules that is practically set by my friend...shall not go into details, and frankly it bores me. the catching up was nice but the drinking was only so-so(maybe it was the foul smelling vodka).

2days ago, was happy to hear from jarjarbeng that he is going to work with his bro. can't really explain it but i was really glad to hear the news. doesn't matter if it sucks or will be smooth sailing, etc. what important most is what we learn from the process.........and seeing him getting involoved is genuinely a great news~

number 5 was a average place, but the company made the evening great. each time i learn more about them and it felt good....... looking fwd to thursday if it does shine....

it's like 忍一时风平浪静， 退一步海阔天空

On my way home, i begin to pen down these thoughts triggered by an incident which happened earlier. It felt so astonisingly amazing that i want to quickly write it down before i forget about them after my shower and late dinner later.

Soccer/Football; why must it always be from this particular sport where rowdiness and hooliganism knocks on my peaceful door. A rough tackle and follow next comes a heated confrontation. Not going into the details to bore you guys, but how i handled or responded to the situation actually made me felt a better man. Sorry, no kungfu fighting, karate chop, shadow kick whatsoever.....it did affect me slightly but only on the positive side. i felt great for being able to compose myself and allow the game to continue and not dampen the mood.

Although i did not speak much, i hope my silent & minimal retaliation will help make the agressor learn his lessons. I was thinking i should have probably said something to make him realised there is something wrong with his ill-manners. I regret i didn't for he looked kinda gloomy and upset after we all cooled down. In any case, i hope he is so because he is doing some soul-searching and reflecting on his behaviour. If so, it would be a good cause and everything would be worth it.

Oh yah! and to think i actually missed a dinner with some girl for this weekly football game......hmmmm, it's still worth it.........

5 days have gone

woah! it has been 5days since my last post. bear with my inconsistency....but you gotta know sometimes the server is down and such.....anyway, last week has been a blast since zero joules of energy has been put to work. feeling kinda guilty for that but i had other happenings that balances things up(about balance again..things that makes me feel less guilty). i had lunch with my buddies and also a long day out with my cousins. should have bought 4D that day for me and my buds have almost never met up at noon time for probably the past 1 year. as for with my cousins...no words in MY vocab could describe how i felt. anyway, we played 4 different ball games that day(that makes us a quadrathalon?) oh yah, btw, my bowling points jumped from 55 to 101, thus arithmetically, it should double up the next time i play the game again right? On top of these are some days which i have forgotten what had taken place, and i categorised them under "rest days". in the midst of this short week...are mundane stuff that are not really worth mentioning....like helping someone, playing soccer, watching a lousy england game, enjoying the rainy weather, etc. then comes the weekend, as usual, tiring but has greater meanings....next, a new week comes creeping in..

i just read my friend's new blog. i met damien and paul.....they speak some sense....senses from which they belong to; the whole psychological part of the homo sapien nickname jarjarbear. after reading his blog. i have one thought- think, but not think too hard, probably life will be easier this way alright? be thankful for you are still aware.

blinded......

just minutes earlier, i was blinded by my sense of mis-judgement, my carelessness, my recklessness and my fondness for adrenaline rush. Soon feelings of guilt and irresponsibility irks me and these reminders i told myself i should seriously bear them in mind and not take them too lightly.....for those involved, i am sorry. Will continue to learn.

early morning sun; the chill, the breeze, the thoughts

Nice chilly cool weather…its my favorite kind of weather…the kind where makes you don’t feel like doing anything else but to just “nua”(laze) at home…..had 7 hours of sleep and it’s still not sufficient…..just 3 hours earlier, it was the same scorching sun every morning that forced me to wake up…not the best morning of all…but from now it should be better…..

Anyway, let me now try to recap the happenings last week that has been rather significant for me ever since don’t know when….lots of things doesn’t seem to interest me anymore….

So, it was actually a trip to botanic garden and a kite flying session on the following day…..remember I always used to feel that the “process” is more important than the “outcome”, now I realized its also the feelings and emotions engaged while executing the process….i felt bliss, joy, responsibility and trust over the two days. They continuingly took place throughout the process and it was them that made everything felt meaningful and joyous. Sometimes, I could be doing the same thing but not them….hence this time round its really different. We gather, took videos, took photographs….we drew and paint under the sun…we watched, we listened, we shared and we enjoyed every min spent together for we know this is not something that easily takes place in future again….even if it does….the place would have changed, the people would have changed….or the weather could have changed…..etc…maybe you will understand what I am talking about when you see those kids express the purest form of joy an adult can rarely do.

The kite day was almost the same but more hectic…like in war-zone….shortage of time and all….i also had a worry that the kids might be disappointed if their kites wouldn’t be soaring in the sky, haha….but nah…everyone was happy and we were glad..…the day ended with a “company’s dinner” and a few rounds of games at the bowling alley where the guys were defeated miserably by the girls…..i remembered I had a score of 55…..is that too low? Hahaha

Anyway picture speaks a thousand words…..here are a few thousands words I have to offer……

Brilliant aren't they.....taken by the kids....


queuing up in an "orderly" fashion and once all done ...we are ready to go.....


this is evidence.

rubbish's rubbish...not exactly

sometimes we read of look at some previous stuff or works that we write or did....we might kinda feel its not really up to standard or weird. I have this very feeling while looking back at my previous post....it's like what the heck?? who in the right frequency would be able to understand what i am trying to say??.....if only my vocab is as massive as the 4000 pages readers' digest dictionary which i own but not use, and my use of the english language and its grammer is as frequent as the number of times i do flush when i finish using the toilet(i.e. all the time). well...can only blame it other tonnes of factors that are hindering me.....things like playing ps2...cycling...msning....sleeping.... eating..looking for my dream girl in my dreams...blah blah.....

anyway....looks like the interval between my posts are getting longer and longer....its not that i am gettin lazier with blogging..but just that i was quite occupied for the past/passed (i don't know which one, delete where applicable) few days. Bear with me for i am gonna screw up the time frames once again....ermm just what am i trying to say....please read on to understand further the rarest lingo on earth. time check; now is already 4.02am and its alittle bit ironic as i read jarjarbeng's msg from my shoutbox (the green box located on the right hand site of the blog where you can write some stuff if you don't happen to know what that'S for). "very good sleeping hours".....whahahaha....yea i tried and is still trying......and i urge my friends to try to...yea i didn't think i would write a blog too...its just happen so that i suddenly likes it...there are many things that will take you by surprise.....oh yah the time frames.....as u all know, so far i always write after midnight....so actually when i said today its meant yesterday technically....but tomorrow i think i might write something that happend 3-4 days ago......i am writing whatever i am writing now not to inform you but to remind myself that i have to do so for myself as what happened then was really interesting and i wouldn' want to forget what had taken place.....what the heck...i need to really sit down and write about the incidents that took place few days back....so with the tiredness that is bugging me now.....i can only blabber these nonsense for now....anyway the numbers are staggering and that is a pleasant surprise.

some pics as promised

the "dragon kiln" at the pottery where pots are left in high temperature for weeks....until technology takes over.....

it look so kampong like... reminds me of much of the "old" changi where i came from...

the ferrari i was refering to...

K....so much for the pics....quite looking forward to tomorrow's trip @ botanic garden....hmm to this date there has been quite a number of "visits" to this blog by some of my friends i think...for those who are new here and having a big question mark in their head over my blog....please read the very first post if you bother....if not....you might be misled, have some misunderstandings or even confused over the words that are filling up this blog overtime...

todae...i had some thoughts over what happened to me over the passed 6 months...its like a dream which i could not be in total control. however, it makes me look at myself differently and understanding myself much better. the way i look at things and relate to people have all changed...just because of one very overwhelming feature of us human.....thoughts......you'll never know how it will suddenly changes its form and when it will take place. maybe some people might not feel the changes....but it has affect me greatly. pros and cons....good and bad.....when you take you give.....it also highlights the balance of things....the balance of merry and sorrow....of good and bad....or even balance in the things we see....like a picture....a scenery....the personalities of friends and strangers. i feel i need to learn to treasure what i have presently with more depth....for once its gone.....you can never have it occur again....and because of that....i try to treasure the problems i am facing now and sees it more of an aid to me....its only problematic when we don't face it....and when we do...nothing comes in our way...

few days ago....i had a weird thought....i was wondering why human has to age and go through the different stages of life.....why can't it be like being 4 for 5 years then 10 for 7 years then 16 for another 7 years blah blah.....ok nuff of "thoughts"....

Splendid Day - the sequel: splendid week

Warning! if long articles bores you and if you intend to miss some interesting happenings that took place...Please refrain from reading on.

this week till now has been hectic. there's a number of outdoor activities planned by my art school and i have to say they are all very interesting and enriching for us and especially for our kids who are attending them. taking the minibus around reminds me of those primary school days when we still go on excursions. it reminds me of those never returning fun and joy and also the fact that such feelings can only be felt once again nostalgically. sometimes i look at those kids and wonder the sad fact of how much would they remember of their childhood when they get older.

Zzzzzz....crappy thoughts aside, its always a joy to have kids around you...their misson i believe as children include one objective of making adults' life merrier. ahha its only through them that i realise how "ugly" adults can be....how unscrupulous...what hyprocrites some can be...how deceiving...etc...the list could go as long as the yellow pages....

anyway, just to highlight some of the programmes that took place earlier of this week....they are the goat farm, pottery place and the art museum. its not exactly extremely happening place to be for some....but its kinda interesting to me and i have never been to these 3 places. we brought the kids to the goat farm on the sunday and the place was packed like sardine..listened to a presentation from a guy talking about how goat milk differs from cow's, how u can have cough and still drink cold goat milk but not cow's, how goat's meat differs from lamb...fact of how we can't get to eat the meat in singapore and the fact that goat can only milk every 6months blah blah....after all the talking, its time to take a walk around the goat farm.....the reaction to children seeing a "teenage" goat is like us seeing a ferrrari or lamborgini....hmm not exactly.....maybe more like seeing a your room filled with gold bars overnight. they go crazy...they laugh they jump they get extremely elated....

next, the SAM......being a singaporean for like 24 years....this is the first ever time i enter the sam.....i know sam can be found anywhere now....but this sam is not the sam you are thinking that i am talking of.....anyway....the sam is having a pretty interesting exhibition titled"fiction@love" till the 2nd of july....according to my understaning, its about the somewhat fusion of animamix art and contemporary art. its a little bit of animation, manga and some other popular culture forms. Its pretty interesting and cost adults only $3. if u can pass off as a child..then u pay half of that....

finally.....the pottery place. nice kampong feel....big place....and lots of pots.....

ok will post some pics soon....